Concussion Discussion

Doctor: "Hi. I'm Dr. wawa-wawa."
(I think he said a real name, but I'm not sure.)
Doctor: "Tell me what happened."
Denise: "I hurt my arm." (Great! I'm gripping my arm. I'm sweating like a pig. I can hardly breathe. Obviously,  I've got the doctor that graduated lowest in his class, or else he wouldn't have to ask that question!)
Doctor: "HOW did you hurt your arm?"
Denise: (Oh...he should have ask that in the 1st place.) "I fell off my bike."
Doctor: "How did that happen."
Denise: "I don't know."
Doctor: "Did anyone see it happen?"
Denise: (What difference does that make?) "My neighbor."
Doctor: "What did he say happened?"
Denise: (I think he's missing the point here. There a great big baseball size bulge on my elbow...and it hurts like H#!!.) "I fell off my bike." (Didn't I say that already.)
Doctor: (Turning to my husband ) "What did the neighbor say happened?"
Husband: "blaahh blaahhh blaahh"
Doctor: "Did you hit your head?"
Denise: "Yes, but I had a helmet on. I think I broke it."
Doctor: "Can you count?"
Denise: (Can I count?! What does he think I am -2? Apparently, he doesn't care that I broke my pretty little butterfly helmet.) "Yes."
Doctor: "Count for me?"
Denise: "1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,15,16,...wait"
Doctor: "What's wrong?"
Denise: "I don't think that's right?" (Maybe I can't count.)
Doctor: "Try again."
Denise: "1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,15,16,...wait"
Doctor: "Do you know where you are?"
Denise: "Yes."
Doctor: (Irritated sigh...) "Can you tell me WHERE you are?"
Denise: "Midlands ER."
Doctor: "Can you tell the date?"
Denise: (I'm betting if I say 'yes', he's going to get irritated, again.) "Yes, it's July."
Doctor: "July what?"
Denise: "I don't know. I probably couldn't have told you BEFORE I hit my head. Isn't that what cell phones are for?" ( O yea, give me your irritated face - I'd give you my irritated face, IF I could get rid of my pain face!)
Doctor: "Tell me the months of the year. January, February, March,..."
Denise: "January, February, March, April, May, June, July, October, Nov...wait."
Doctor: "Something wrong?"
Denise: "I think I missed a  month?"
Doctor: "Try again."
Denise: "January, February, March, April, May, June, July, October, Nov...wait."
Doctor: (To my husband) "She has a slight concussion."
Denise: (Apparently, a slight concussion means - I can't understand and he needs to explain it to someone who doesn't have a concussion.) "But, I had a helmet on."
Doctor: "Good thing. I think we should do a CT scan. What do you think?"
Denise: (Seriously, you don't think I can understand that I have a concussion, but you think I can figure out if I need a CT or not? Has the world gone mad?) "I don't think I can make that decision. What do you think?"
Doctor: "Well, since I can't see inside your head that's the only way I'll know."
Denise: "Do you think you need to know?"

Doctor: "You have a slight concussion."
Denise: (Now he tells ME.) 
Husband: "Yes, do the CT."
Denise: (Well, at least someone is in charge. Good ol' marine.)
Doctor: (To some fleeting stranger in the room) "Let's get her some pain medication."
Denise:  (FINALLLLY!! It's the only reason I've stayed here THIS long. Well, except for the fact I'm too dizzy to walk and there is something wrong with my knee - which I can't figure out.)
MULTIPLE X-RAYS AND CT, LATER:
Doctor: "Well, nothing is broken and I can't see anything on the CT."
Denise: (I thought the reason we were doing the CT was so you COULD see. Wait, is he being funny, i.e. he can't see anything - like my brain?  No, this guy does not have a  funny bone...he's as serious as a heart attack. This is his way of saying 'nothing is wrong' that he can see. I think the Dr. needs a course in communication with people who have a concussion. Perhaps, I'll develop one.)  "Well, that's good - right?"
Doctor: "Right. We are going to give you some good pain medication, a sling for that arm and send you home. You have lots of bruises, swelling, and scrapes"
Denise: (Scrapes? So, he calls being flayed by a concrete road - scraped...hmmm.  Somehow I get the impression he's really glad to see me go.) "Good, I'm ready to go." (Of course, I've forgotten that I've been injected with those "good" pain drugs, tetanus, and two or three other things whose names and purposes I've forgotten. The upside I don't have to talk to this guy, again!) "I don't think I can walk."
Doctor: "We'll get a wheelchair."
Denise: (I hope he isn't expecting me to 'tuck 'n roll'. I've already done that and it didn't work out so well.) "Thanks."
Doctor: "You'll need a new helmet. They are only good for one crash."
Denise: (Now, he brings up my helmet. Geeez.) "OK."
Doctor: "Be careful."
Denise: "K. Bye."
Doctor: "Bye."
TWO DAYS, LATER:
Denise:  "January, February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September, October, Nov ... 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11, 12, 13, 14, 15,16,... whew!"